If we MUST eat a entire bag of Oreos.
Which scenario is better?
- Eat the entire bag in 30 minutes
- Eat the bag slowly, and evenly throughout a day?
More enjoyment if you spread it out over the whole day, plus you won’t barf. You might shit liquid, but y’know, lesser evil I’d say.
Scrape off all the cream and eat a bowlful of that, then snack on the burnt cookies the rest of the day.
If you are intermittent fasting, then eat in one 30 minute window. If not, no fucking idea.
I love that the question doesn’t specify what “better” means, and we’re all interpreting it in our own ways. Healthier? More enjoyable?
Eat them all at once
I’d probably barf if I ate the whole pack in one sitting. Or at least feel like I would.
Can confirm, I felt like that once and it made me quit Oreos for a long while. I still don’t quite enjoy them as much and do limit how many I eat. So I guess that’s good?
Probably across the course of the day parts maybe faster than others
Eating sugary stuff that sticks in your teeth continuously throughout the day is the worst possible you can do for the teeth.
Binge eating sweets is pretty bad for blood sugar.
So to balance it out eat a third after every meal for max health and enjoyment.
So do a line after you dine?
It depends on what you want your poop to look like later.
oh i don’t plan on pooping.
Do you just let it happen when the time comes?
I miss the spontaneity of my youth.
As a Canadian, unfortunately the answer is now to not eat them at all because they are an American product. This breaks my heart because I am the type of person that would eat an entire bag throughout the day :(
What about Canadian off-brand? Is that a thing? Like at Canadamart or Tim Horton’s or wherever y’all shop?
We have “Eat the Middle First” but they’re not that great sadly
So Canada doesn’t have decent cookies either?
I tried them once (in EU) to see what those famous cookies were like and they’re crap.
Not even mediocre.technically it’s an off off brand because Oreos themselves are an off brand
True, but Hydrox is also American, so no dice.
darn :(, I tried
Yes that’s very on point for the question being asked, thanks.
The package is conveniently divided into breakfast, lunch, and dinner rows.
We call that doing lines around these parts.
You’re eating those as a treat, not for your health. You probably know the negative impact that sugar and trans fats have, so if you’re going to treat yourself, I’d say make sure to make it count.
Do you get more overall pleasure from a little bit of enjoyment throughout the day or from a lot of enjoyment for a short amount of time? Maybe half now and half later or tomorrow? That’s how I decide how to eat/do stuff that I enjoy but know can negatively impact my health if I over do it.
If you do want to make it less unhealthy though, try to make sure they’re not the only thing in your stomach and rinse your mouth after you’re done eating them.
Eat them right before a big, protein heavy meal. The sugar will stimulate insulin production which will help to process more of the protein. And then have a couple for dessert.
Huh, is that why I can’t seem to find a non sweet protein powder?
no that’s probably because whey tastes absolutely awful so they try to cover up the flavor.
it’s usually a synthetic sweetener and I’ve found plant based protein powders are usually less guilty of it.
I’m vegan anyway, so I go for soy protein! But I’d like an unflavored one to add to my oats and flavour them a different way. First world problem though.
You can buy unflavoured whey concentrate or isolate in bulk for very cheap. I used to use it to make protein pancakes for breakfast all the time.
Nom nom nom.
Edit: I see you’re vegan. Not sure I’ve seen unflavoured vegan ones.
In a large bowl, combine 750ml of your closest booze and the Oreos. Use a potato masher to create a smooth yet chunky consistency. Best enjoyed naked while binge watching Bojack Horseman.
I only had a bottle of Listerine, but two birds, one stone. No need to go brush after now.
The mint will compliment it nicely. I love mint Oreos
Around here, we just call that “Sunday”.
U bastard. U just reminded me I have a KitKat to eat. Do I eat the entire thing or spread it over the day?
Is it already in the freezer and ready?
Yes! Both. And Second Kitkat
Its one of those large blocks tho
Ehhh, I’d say that, on average and for most purposes, spread out is better.
Less of a hit to your system. No big blood sugar spikes, which reduces the worst aspects if swallowing an entire package to the minimum it gets.
That being said, expect digestive issues to linger. You’ve got a lot of fats, the coloring, and the sugars playing havoc with your guts.
Expect to need a lot of tooth brushing unless you just enjoy having plaque and acid build-up messing with your teeth.
But I’d say that the risks of big spikes in blood sugar are higher than those risks. It could, in the right circumstances, kill you. And the way some of the more recent information regarding the role of sugar in atherosclerosis, and maybe other cardiovascular illness, is looking, every big spike is whittling time off of your heart more than a bunch of little ones will.
I was thinking the opposite. The first one s a huge sugar hit, and every following one.
- If you spread it out, your body efficiently digests them to maximize the sugar spikes, to maximize the calories absorbed to turn into fat
- if you do them all in one sitting, you only get one sugar spike and much of the fat and sugar won’t even be digested
One of the first things I did when I first moved out from my parents is eat a whole bag of Oreos for breakfast because I could.
It turns your poop black.
Yup :)
I’ve had to clean up oreo poop lol.
A lot of older patients tend to get a “sweet tooth”, and they’ll go nuts on cookies and cakes.
Oreo poops aren’t the worst poops, but they look bad and are super sticky.
Oreo poops aren’t the worst poops, but they look bad and are super sticky.
What are the worst poops? Curry night?
Wtf kind of cafeteria is serving these old people?
Fecal contamination is a fact of life or, put succinctly, shit happens.
for most purposes, spread out is better. Less of a hit to your system
The digestive system is not built for boredom.
It works best with lots of changes and irregularities. Single events of such stress are no problem at all (only many repeated events of the same stress are bad). The same goes for a day or two of staying hungry.
Yeah, but it’s also not meant to process a giant package of processed fats, levels of sugar we haven’t had time to adapt to, or the colorant used that is known to irritate the bowel.
Which is why folks that go on a cookie spree like that end up constipated or loose and crampy. Which, yeah there’s some folks that would be able to take a giant hit of junk like that without noticing it, but I’ve had to clean up the mess left by Oreos when patients would go crazy on them for one reason or another (often dementia, sadly).
No, it isn’t going to kill you, or send you to the hospital purely by the digestive side of things, but it can fuck up your day lol.
Also, you’re misrepresenting not only what I said, but what the digestive tract is “built” for. It doesn’t actually benefit from irregularity of diet. It can handle it, but eating a fairly stable, non irritating diet keeps both the gut flora and the associated hormonal products produced in the intestines at a reliable operation. The more you disturb the system, the less stable the system. When it comes to gut flora and serotonin production in the gut, high sugar intake disrupts in a way that can have lingering effects; anything from a day to a week.
Don’t mistake the difference between a varied healthy diet and shoving irritants down the pipes. They aren’t the same thing.
