Eating the proper amount is hard. Eating when you have low time, money, mental energy, or education on cooking is even harder.
This book assumes nothing. Do you know how to turn on your stove? You are properly prepared to use this cookbook.
Just want to share it with more folks!
I’ll share my recipe since it isn’t in the book.
Block of Smoked Tofu
Preparation: cut open the packaging with a knife, put on a plate, and eat with your hands.
Smoked tofu tastes good enough to eat it by itself, and it’s a great source of protein and fat.
I tried tofu once. I didn’t super love it, but I’ll give it another shot
Try baking it next time
I’m in a motel with only a microwave and mini fridge at the moment (and for the foreseeable future) so unfortunately I can’t bake. Is grilled tofu a thing? They have some grills outside
I’ve never been so bold. Maybe if you wrap it in foil with some sauce and veggies.
Yeah, I was thinking it would probably need to be wrapped
I also eat raw smoked tofu blocks sometimes, but try cutting it into strips and sautéing them if you really want to give it a shot. You can eat that with whatever you like your fries with. I tend to go for a sriracha mayo.
Before you cut it up, drain any water from it, and wrap it in a clean dish towel, then press it under a cutting board or something flat for like 20 seconds on each side. If you get extra firm smoked tofu, that should be all you really need to do, but you can also toss it in seasoned flour (or a seasoned 1:1 mixture of flour and corn starch) first
There are so many different types of tofu and different ways to prepare them that all taste vastly different. That stuff is basically a blank canvas.
It was in ramen and got soggy
I find it’s key to squeeze out the water with tofu so it can absorb the flavors you’ve adding. I place it between two plates with some weight on top (a pound or so is plenty) for like 10 minutes, then squish the plates together a bit over the sink to drain and that’s usually plenty. Fish sauce makes a nice flavoring if you’re into that.
Yeah, tofu by itself can be very boring, but it really shines with the right spices or marinade. The simplest way to make tofu that still tastes great is to cut it up, put the pieces in a container with a tablespoon of soy sauce and some Sriracha (amount depending on your chili tolerance), and shake the container. Then you can use it in many ways, for example by placing it on something that is releasing a lot of steam, like rice that is almost done cooking.
I would steal this if I wasn’t allergic to soy XD
I can make a pasta meal under $6 that’s generally made to last. The only determining factors is what additives you can add to it. My poor man’s meal consist of the pasta (those $1 ones at wal-mart), tomato sauce (my choice has always been Tomato/Basil/Onion kinds) now the fun part is the additives themselves.
I’ve gotten imitation crab legs ($1 for the snack kind), croutons, chopped turkey franks .etc anything. You can just add damn near anything to the pasta that’ll get you through a bit. I’ve only recently been adding frozen chopped spinach to the dishes, boil them up, dump them in.
All for a reasonable price. I don’t usually pay anymore than $8 for a complete meal.
Instant Noodles Carbonara
Cook instant noodles in a pan. Chuck an egg in and mash it about a bit.
When the water is nearly all gone, chuck in a load of cheese (I use strong cheddar and grated mozzarella) and a couple of chopped up Peperamis. Mix it all about until the cheese starts burning.
Eat that shit.
PBnJ. 3 ingredients.No cooking. Get lost with any cook book.
Incoming: peanut allergy
Nutella?
Do I look like I’m made of money?
Skip the PB.
To add my own bachelor chow to this
Meat of some kind these frozen vegetables And KD
What’s KD, precious?
Either Kraft Dinner (Mac and cheese) or Kentucky Deluxe. Either way is sad.
what about craft dinner is sad? like I know it’s not top notch but i can’t say I ever felt like it was a bad thing
Mac & Cheese, the polite weirdos to our north call it Kraft Dinner.
Found the not Canadian
That doesn’t sound too hard. Most people are not Canadian.
I love the concept of this book but was pretty disappointed by the actual recipes tbh.
Same here. Last time this was shared I found a single recipe kind of interesting, but not enough for me to actually memorize what it was.
Thinking back, it was probably the Mac and Cheese one, and I had already wanted to try to make it anyway (it’s not a very common dish in my country, or at least my circle)
You might not be the target audience. I’m not currently the target audience either.
My wife and I are really into cooking. We have a whole bookshelf of cookbooks, a metrowire rack full of “kitchen stuff” and we use it daily.
There was definitely a time when this book would have been perfect. This book seems to cover a lot of stuff that’s obvious to me now but wasn’t always.
If you’re food plan is a bulk package of Ramen, any help on how to make it not the same as every other day is culinary gold.
The title is quite literal. It’s not “some simple tasty recipes”, it’s depression-level-bare-minimum-effort-food ;)
Before I had access to the internet; These were basically my, ‘Don’t die, eat something easy’ list of relatively quick foods back in the darkest, deepest depression days (turns out my brain chemistry reacts horribly to antidepressants and antipsychotics). I was just an anxious dude that didn’t know it due to being heavily medicated.
First glance of the thumbnail had me thinking this was a D&D sourcebook.
Replace the vase of flowers with a tub of Vaseline or moisturizer.
For a D&D cooking show, check out Delicious in Dungeon!
Some heavy hitters here
Have you been reading my diary?
I’m so guilty of both
I need this book.
Click download! PDF is free.
I want PAY
There is a link to buy a physical copy if you like.
Some days, you need a reminder that eating anything is better than eating nothing.
Seeing this post prompted me to cook for myself, thank you for sharing this valuable resource 😊
Pros: high protein food
Cons: makes a spoon dirty
Suggested improvements to recipe: note to thoroughly lick spoon clean, or use a finger to swipe up the peanut butter.
Use napkin for remaining peanut butter before you put it in the sink. Then it will make the spoon less intimidating to wash.
Why is the spoon dirty? Just lick it until it’s clean of peanut butter and put it back in the drawer. /s
Nah, let your dog lick it clean since they have cleaner mouths than us filthy humans. Whenever I’m done eating I just let my dog lick the plate/bowl/whatever clean and then it’s good to go back in the cupboard.
/s
This was the premise of one of those ‘that really happened’ reddit stories.
For me, I’m more concerned about getting bacteria into the highly nutritious PB. If you’re only eating one spoonful then fine. I wouldn’t stick a spoon that’s been in my mouth back into the container though. I have done this “meal” though, but I scoop how much I want into a bowl first. Maybe drizzle some honey or something onto it.
Mix up your PB&J in a bowl. That shit is fire. Raspberry preserves are very good
Butter knife it onto some crackers. (I prefer Ritz.) The knife never goes into the mouth so I can keep using it. Does make a mess on the counter or table if you don’t use a paper towel or plate(or bowl) to catch most of the crumbs. Guess you could eat over the sink…
Warning: do NOT overdo peanut butter on a spoon if you have a dry mouth
Ah, I’ve been making these recipes for decades. It tracks with my cooking skills.
I had no idea I was qualified to be a cookbook author.
I substituted a knife for the spoon and I feel like it still came out ok.
As long as it’s not a fork you’re good.
Works for crunchy. Any thick peanut butter really
Tastes like it has a little extra iron in it
That’s the blood from the cuts in your tongue.
It’s not as funny when you point out the joke
★☆☆☆☆
Substituted a knife for the spoon and caulk for peanut butter. Awful taste, horrible recipe. Do not recommend. Would put zero stars but it won’t let me.
Karen, MO
Best is when you’re at the end and you bring out the spatula. It’s like a mini Christmas.
That is the most important tool in my kitchen.
You know you were gonna have a second serving anyway, may as well just skip the trouble and have both at once.
Okay this made me tear up and is perfect. Peanut Butter On A Spoon is a large percentage of what i have been eating lately. I feel seen.
Some days, or weeks, it’s enough!
Maybe shake it up from time to time with something else from the book, but I understand where some months eating enough to keep the stomach pains away is just all that can be done.
Yes! Very luckily my health flares only seem to get real bad for a few days at a time nowadays, so i do have some “real food” mixed in, but as a person who has been struggling with shame about eating less well than i wish i could on those days it is very nice to be reminded that food, literally any food at all, is good enough and in fact an act of love toward myself. Excited to peruse the book for some more ideas
This made my night. What a well-written and kind product
my favorite depression meal is an easy rice and beans. buy those flavored rice sides that come in a bag, chicken flavor is a good default option. cook it per instructions, then throw in a drained can of black beans and whatever frozen veggies sound good. don’t even bother heating up the beans or veggies, there’s enough heat in the rice that everything ends up nice and warm. just give it all a stir and you’re done.
the rice sides have enough flavor to make everything taste good as is, but there’s definitely room to toss in whatever spices are within arms reach that sound good.
My favorite depression meal is drugs and sleep.
Sometimes I have this just for fun, as a treat.
And my absolute fave depression breakfast is waking up on the sofa still drunk, just in time to get ready for work
I don’t get this one, surely you can just buy pasta sauce instead and it’s exactly the same steps but better 🤔
I don’t like ketchup like that. Fires, sure. Burger? A little. This? This is fucking gross. I also knew someone that put it on their pizza. On the inverse, I can eat yellow mustard straight
This is for people who might not have pasta sauce in their pantry, but most people will have ketchup in the fridge.
100%, some of these recipes are “scavenge for food with things in the back of your fridge/pantry”
Or packets from a fast food restaurant
i once had a long article in a pre-internet punk 'zine about the different meals you can make with free food like condiments… salt pepper water ketchup mustard relish honey etc. it also taught how to use toothpaste as hair gel.
it was eye opening.
It doesn’t happen to still exist does it? Sounds like a very interesting read
i don’t have it. it was at Moby Disc record store in the 1990s, maybe someone collects 'zines.
I’m gonna try to search for it later today. Any details you can add would help a ton
paperback, like half a 8.5 x 11. cover was blue and included a drawing of a payphone. the zine also included punk album reviews.
i see archive.org/details/zines has a ton of sinilar
Pasta and ketchup is a common meal in Paris according to the one French Netflix show I watched where they ate it and never commented about how absurd it is.
Maybe French ketchup is different than American ketchup?
Probably doesn’t contain corn syrup.
Almost certainly
It’s almost certainly Heinz, and in no permutation you cannot find everywhere else in the world.
Would be a great reaction meme if you took out cooking and centered the remaining text
I’ve been trying to learn more about GIMP, so here you go.
Oh wait, was I supposed to leave it slanted?
Ay, DIY gimp skills make a homemade meme truly tasty
Dear diary, today the internet delivered. Cheers to your GIMP learning journey!
Works either way, nice work.
Ahh this is not a “go buy” something recipe.
This is a “If you are thinking of not eating because you feel like you have nothing to eat, eat this instead”
When I discovered this cookbook, I printed it out on regular printer paper and spent an hour or two hardcover binding it with a bookcloth spine and fancy foreign cover papers with gold foil and flocking. It looks so nice!
Then I immediately had to use it because I can manage professionally binding a shitty printout of the Sad Bastard Cookbook, but I cannot adequately feed myself. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ This cookbook is great!
Quite possibly the most glowing review/recommendation for the book. Clearly a motivated and talented individual, but they STILL need help cooking!
Page 19.
"Kinda Like Pad Thai
Peanut butter and sweet chili sauce mix together to make something which tastes kinda like you’d imagine Pad Thai sauce would taste if you’ve never had Pad Thai before. It’s delicious. Real Pad Thai is even more so."
This is actually a great book! I don’t like cooking so this is right up my alley.
