You forgot the other two mads.

Social acceptance lies in the delivery.

Watching this malarkey from Japan. I’m ~80% sure me and my family are safe.

Trump: First US President to try to invade Canada (since Alan Alda).

And the reason school bathrooms can’t just have kitchen doors that you can back into to open from either direction?

“Don’t die for a cigarette.”

Poetic irony.

I hope this causes that company to become absolutely buried in litigation and debt.

We have to make the difficult decision to part ways with companies that cause undue stress in the people they employ.

Jesus would’ve dragged Ray Kroc into the streets and let everyone have at him.

Seinfeld: “I’ll tell you what I don’t like about social media censors…”

“You have my drone.”

“AND MY AXE!!”

Conclusion: Kim Kardashian is the primary source of the Ebola Virus in America.

Just like In-N-Out, there’s a secret menu.

Barber: “What’ll it be?”

Me: “Give me a double-double!”

audible gasps

“Neverending Story? No, the story definitely came to an end.”

Now you’re the art for a true crime podcast.

Happy intrusive thoughts.

Lol that movie is not legal advice.

Not what I meant.

You were going on about carefully convincing other people to vote not guilty and all I could think about was the process of persuasion that slowly flipped the jury in that movie.

Everyone needed something different for them to consider, then actually believe, that the defendant might be innocent.

Everyone reading this, watch the movie 12 Angry Men and take copious notes.

Meanwhile, at the suspect’s hideout:

Unless you’re that store’s manager, you should be more upset that people who are hungry aren’t being fed to the point they resort to theft.

Actually, you should be more upset by that either way. I understand not wanting to support theft of food just to eat but something is wrong when you condemn it.

Maybe so. But if there’s any possibility it’s a genuine need, don’t ruin a baby’s chance to get fed.