Erratic Deutsche Bahn services make our commutes a misery. Luckily, their meaningless announcements are an art form
My favourite excuse is an expression that might one day be emblematic of contemporary Germany. I hear Deutsche Bahn wants staff to stop using it, but it can’t banish it from our minds. Verzögerungen im Betriebsablauf – “operational delays” – is meaningful and meaningless in a way that only the German language allows. One day it might even become one of those golden words co-opted into the English language – like zeitgeist or schadenfreude. (Let’s retire Blitz, a word that is jaded and overused in sport, politics and beyond.)
Verzögerungen im Betriebsablauf is the magic phrase for not getting anywhere fast while also suggesting everything is full steam ahead. It is sinister in a beautiful way. It is a phrase Kafka might use if he were writing today, a perfect description of a situation where no one can do anything but everyone is busy.
One theory goes that the decline began in the mid-90s, when the government started its efforts to make Deutsche Bahn fit for sale.
Yep, that’ll do it.
Privatising infrastructure is stupid AF. It was part of the 90s Zeitgeist, which haunts us to this day.
Yeah privatization in general doesn’t work great. The only good arguments I’ve heard for private ownership is the initial investment portion.
And it was known to be stupid in the 1990s already. The only people who benefit from it are the investors. Everyone else pays for their dividend.
As theories go, this one is pretty well supported by evidence.
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Not sure if that excuse is officially approved for that particular situation, would have to look it up in the official DB excuse catalogue. (Yes, such a thing does in fact exist)
The fact that it exists is not even that bad. As long as it was limited to events like suicides that have good reasons not to talk about them openly I would have no problem with that.
Suicides by train were never announced as suicides. The term before they re-coined it to “Notarzeinsatz am Gleis” (roughly translates to “severe medical emergency near the track”) was “Personenunfall” (accident involving a person).
My point was merely that it would be fine to have a guiding document for acceptable phrasing for events like that for the employees. It would also be fine for things too technically detailed to be understood by most customers for that matter.
The problem arises when you use something like that for things that you shouldn’t be hiding as a company.
Last weekend, a few friends of mine and I made a trip halfway through Europe. I took the plane because I couldn’t get a ticket on the train any more, the others took the night jet (Austrian train service driving through the night with beds on board).
My 1.5h flight was delayed, and it was a big drama with connecting flights etc. It was by 5 minutes.
My friends’ route was through Germany. Besides them needing 14h according to the regular schedule, they had a delay of 3h. There was no special accident or anything, the train just had to stop on the track a few times and in some sections it went at walking speed, probably because the track is in such a bad shape.
This is such a miserable experience. The price was about the same, btw.
This is such a miserable experience. The price was about the same, btw.
Tbh if it wasn’t for horrendous delays I’d still prefer a 14 hour night train over a 1.5 hour flight that in reality is usually a 5 hour test of my ability to kill time waiting. I’d rather get on at 8 pm, watch a movie, fall asleep, get up, have breakfast in the bistro car and get off at 10 am. Especially if it’s the same price. Usually night trains are considerably more expensive if you desire any kind of comfort or privacy.
What a stupid take…